My mission here at The Modest Man is to help short men dress well. But why?
On the surface, this website is just a style blog. But it’s not really about the clothes we wear or appearances at all.
Wanting to look good is just one manifestation of a much more fundamental desire that people like you feel, way deep down in your being.
I made a video to explain what I’m talking about, and I’m calling it The Modest Manifesto (see what I did there?).
These are my core beliefs that drive everything I do here at The Modest Man:
Text Version (Video Transcript)
In this world, there are many, many things over which you have NO control, but that influence your life.
Things like your ethnicity, your genes, how you were raised, your age, illness, your childhood, your eye color, your skin color, your IQ, the economy…
…and of course, you can’t control your height.
It’s so easy to spend so much of your time and energy dwelling on these things you can’t control.
And that typically leads to one of two negative feelings: worry or regret.
Worry is when you experience anxiety about something that hasn’t even happened yet, and might not happen at all.
Regret is when you feel bad about something that happened in the past – something that you can’t change.
Worry and regret are not productive feelings. They don’t make you happy, and don’t help you get stuff done, so they should be avoided at all costs.
So instead of dwelling on all of the things that you can’t control, make every effort to focus on the things that you can control.
Things like your habits, your grooming routine, continuing education, your haircut, the way you smell, your skills, how you spend your time, who your friends are…
…and of course, your style.
If you can manage to do this, it will lead to increased confidence, happiness and fulfillment.
Now obviously, this sounds great, but how do you actually do it?
Well, my friend, it takes effort.
And this is why so many people aren’t satisfied with their lives – because it’s not easy to put in the effort required to change the things that can be changed.
But what is effort?
Effort is some combination of time and money – two resources that are so precious and limited that almost everyone wishes they had more of each.
And while you can make more money, you can’t make more time.
So my advice is to start with the easy stuff.
Of all those factors you can influence, your style is the low hanging fruit.
Sure, you can transform your body by exercising and eating well, and that’s a worthwhile pursuit.
But it’s really, really hard – much harder than simply changing the way that you dress.
That’s why upgrading your style is a great entry into the vast world of personal development.
It’s not that hard. You just have to:
- Understand clothing fit
- Understand your body type
- Get good at shopping
- Learn where to shop
- Try new brands
- Get your clothes tailored
- Experiment with color
- Find a style role model
- Keep learning
- Don’t settle
That last one is important: never settle for subpar style.
Ignore everything you can’t control.
Focus instead on things you can control, and start with style.
Don’t ever let anything you can’t control hold you back, especially your height.
You only get one life, so live huge!
If this way of thinking resonates with you, be sure to ‘like’ it and share it with someone who needs to hear this message.
And as always, please share your thoughts by leaving a comment below.
Until next time, stay stylish!
Great video and it is inspiring. I started my journey of self improvement only 2 months ago and I can’t believe how much I’ve accomplished. I’m 10 pounds lighter and 2 sizes smaller from adopting a fitness routine but I’ve also followed the advise from you and a few others.
I can’t stress enough how important fit is to this equation. When I went to a tailor and had her fix my existing clothes it made a huge difference. I thought I was buying clothes that fit me well (i.e. CK body fit chinos) but there was still a lot of extra fabric. Same thing with many CK slim fit shirts I owned.
I’ve added things to my wardrobe that I likely wouldn’t have without some direction – denim jacket, white tennis shoes, stylish sunglasses etc.
You are right. It takes time. I took the advice for wardrobe items and made a spreadsheet on my IPAD. I estimated how much everything would cost and then I prioritized purchases. I track every expense including the tailor. I have spend a decent amount of money but I’m also starting to learn the art of buying deals online. It’s a little like Christmas when you come home to a package and there is always a little nervous energy to see if things fit. So far so good.
Thanks again for all the great advice!
Very inspiring, Andrew! Keep it up!
DL Renollet says
Andrew. I’m just right behind you. It’s been a couple of years for me. Your story is very inspiring. Online has been a real benefit in this area, and like Brock says, learn what brands tend to work, yet one must always be open to new concepts. I say i’ve been doing this two years, but JUST this year. I ditched my jean shorts, my drawer full or those godforsaken Cargo shorts – and finally picked up some flat front chino shorts. In my case Old Navy and Levi’s were very cost effective and I’m starting to learn. Okay – first try on, then wash—-then bring to the tailor! And so my goal is to always have something in the tailor cycle insofar as it is affordable. Also buying clothing out of season, one can save big. I picked up two Barbour Winter coats at a steal so to speak. It’s really fun – work – but the rewards are potentially a more full rich life. Well worth having that on the radar!
Larry Bivens says
Well said Brock!
Khoi N. (@lifeaskhoi) says
Love this. Of course you know this resonates with me. I’m going to be in touch soon!