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16 Things Wives Do in Marriage That Would Be Grounds for Divorce if Their Husbands Did Them

Updated on December 9, 2025 by TMM Staff · Dating & Confidence

A man and woman stand apart on a grassy hill.
©Alexander Mass/Unsplash.com

If you think that double standards no longer apply to marriages, then think again. They are still very much alive and relevant, even in modern times. There are certain behaviors that are forgiven and brushed aside when wives do them. However, if the husband were to do the same, then this would constitute grounds for divorce. These double standards have left men feeling ostracized and profoundly resentful. If women do any of these things, then they are forgiven, while men are called toxic, chauvinistic, misogynistic, and so on. Read on and learn about these things that wives get away with but women get antagonized for right here.

Table of Contents

Toggle
  • Criticism
  • Managing Expenses
  • Expecting Emotional Support
  • Withholding Affection
  • Flirting
  • Using an Emotional Leash
  • Dismissing Feelings
  • Venting About Him to Family and Friends
  • Mind Reading
  • Double Standards for Freedom
  • Prioritizing Family
  • Criticizing Hobbies
  • Using Past Mistakes in Arguments
  • Expectations of Handling Everything
  • Shaming on the Basis of Appearance
  • Threats of Divorce
  • Final Thoughts

Criticism

A girl with a retro camera sits on the chair and tries to take photos of the guy that is shirtless.
©Getty Images/Unsplash.com

When wives mock or make jokes about their husbands’ intelligence, weight, habits, or the way they do things in public and private moments, then it is accepted and brushed aside. That is because it is treated as something innocuous, but if the man were to do this, he would immediately be castigated and ostracized by everyone around him.

Managing Expenses

A woman holding cash money in her hands.
©Sasun Bughdaryan/Unsplash.com

Many wives feel like they can manage or oversee how their husbands spend their money, especially on their personal expenses. They are even questioned about it, but if the roles are reversed, then the husband is called controlling, domineering, and utterly callous about his wife’s needs.

Expecting Emotional Support

A man giving medicines to his sick wife.
©Curated Lifestyle/Unsplash.com

A woman is always expecting her husband to support her unconditionally and completely on an emotional basis. He has to be the one to accord comfort and put in the labor without expecting anything in return because she just needs help. He will be labeled as selfish if he asks for help or demands emotional support from her.

Withholding Affection

A woman and a man sitting back to back on a couch.
©Getty Images/Unsplash.com

A woman can use affection as a bartering tool and even as a means for punishment against her husband. Her actions will be condoned and understood. It is said that she just might not be in the mood and that is why she is repelling all attempts at intimacy. However, if a man does that, withholds physical affection and intimacy, then he is called manipulative and resentful.

Flirting

A man smiling and poking an upset woman to initiate intimacy and she looks away while they lie on a bed.
©Getty Images/unsplash.com

A woman can flirt and even reciprocate, restrictively, advances from other men, and then it is fine because she’s a beautiful woman and she can receive compliments. But if it were a man, then she would be screaming pure vitriol in his ear and demanding a divorce.

Using an Emotional Leash

A woman reading text messages of her husband while he is sleeping.
©Getty Images/Unsplash.com

A woman can surveil and keep track of her husband’s whereabouts, who he meets, where he goes, where he spends his money and other details about his life. She won’t be upbraided or rebuked because she’s just being thoughtful and caring. However, if a man does it, then he will be called controlling, doubting, and manipulative to the extreme.

Dismissing Feelings

A man is branded as cold or insensitive if he belittles his wife’s feelings or says she’s overreacting. However, wives can do it to their husbands, and no one will call them out for it. That is because men are expected to be strong and unflinching and not experience such sensitive emotions.
A man and a woman screaming at each other.

Venting About Him to Family and Friends

A group of people gathered around a table.
©Annie Spratt/Unsplash.com

Some wives can’t help but share every flaw, mistake, argument, and frustration they have about their husbands with their close circle of friends and family members. She will be justified in doing so, while the same isn’t true for the man. If he were to vent about his feelings to his social circle, then he would be called a betrayer for breaching his partner’s confidentiality.

Mind Reading

Wives expect their husbands to be able to read their minds and fix whatever is wrong with them in a jiffy without communicating about it at all. When they aren’t able to do so, they tend to launch tirades and blame games. Men are expected to quietly bear it and tough it out. However, if the husband expects the same treatment from his wife, then he is called unrealistic, cruel, and downright immature.
A man talking to a woman who is sitting next to him.

Double Standards for Freedom

A woman using a cell phone while her husband is lying with her is feeling neglected.
©Getty Images/Unsplash.com

A woman can have private DMs, hang out late with the girlfriends, and even send questionable texts. But the same liberties aren’t accorded nor are they tolerated for men. If the husband were to speak up about this or set the rules, then he would be called jealous or controlling.

Prioritizing Family

A group of people standing next to each other.
©Aly Ramirez/Unsplash.com

The woman can prioritize her family over his all the time without any objection or issues. However, his family always comes second and any time he spends with them is looked upon with disdain and sheer disapproval

Criticizing Hobbies

A man is playing video games while his wife is looking at him in anger.
©Getty Images/Unsplash.com

Wives feel justified and entitled to criticize their husbands’ hobbies and pastimes with little regard for their emotional stability or respect. However, if a man were to extend the same treatment to her, then he would be called controlling and unwilling to understand her.

Using Past Mistakes in Arguments

A man and a woman sitting on a couch.
©Blake Cheek/Unsplash.com

Women hold onto past mistakes and weaponize them against their husbands in any future disagreement or argument. No one calls them scheming but if a man were to do this, then he would instantly be labeled as reprehensible and emotionally manipulative.

Expectations of Handling Everything

A woman complaining to her husband, who is sitting next to her on a couch.
©Getty Images/Unsplash.com

Women expect to be praised always for what they do for their household. They are justified in asking for appreciation because, after all, they handle quite a lot, from planning, parenting, managing stress, and so on, within the household. However, while praise for them is appreciated and even demanded, no such courtesy is extended towards men. They are expected to do what they do without making a fuss or asking for any acknowledgement.

Shaming on the Basis of Appearance

A man and a woman laughing together.
©Jeremias Ybañez/Unsplash.com

A woman won’t tolerate any comments made about her appearance, weight, height, or sense of style. She will be outraged and be justified in her anger. But she can easily criticize and mock the same aspects in their husbands without any fear of retribution or reprimanding.

Threats of Divorce

A woman screaming on her husband, who is sitting with her on the bed.
©Curated lifestyle/Unsplash.com

Finally, women can make threats of divorce with utter impunity and never be reproached for it. However, such assertions from men will be met with cries of horror and outrage. He will be called insensitive, callous, and cruel.

Final Thoughts

A man and a woman embracing each other.
©Curated lifestyle/Unsplash.com

Husbands and wives both need to bring their best efforts and intentions to a marriage. Understanding and tolerance are the cornerstones of every marriage and if they vanish, then so does the integrity and cohesion within a marriage. That is why both spouses should endeavor to accord them to each other aptly and sincerely try to maintain respect and love within their bond.

Dating & Confidence

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About TMM Staff

The Modest Man staff writers are experts in men's lifestyle who love teaching guys how to live their best lives.

If an article is published under TMM Staff, that means multiple writers worked on it. For example, sometimes several of us have experience with a certain brand, so we collaborate to publish a more thorough review.

Or, if an article was originally written by one person, but then it was updated by someone else, we'll re-publish it under TMM Staff.

Remember: all of our articles (including those below) are written by real people with decades of combined experience in men's fashion and lifestyle topics.

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