As parents, you think you’re doing fine, then someone points out the door’s upside down, and now you’re second-guessing everything. But here’s the thing, most of us are doing better than we think. Especially if you’re seeing some of these signs pop up around your house.
So if you’re walking around with that worry in the back of your mind, take a breather. If a few of these 16 signs sound familiar, you’re likely doing a bang-up job even if your living room currently looks like a tornado of Legos and half-eaten snacks.
1. They say “please” without being told
Ever hear your kid say “please” at the dinner table without any eye-daggers from you across the room? That’s huge. That means manners are starting to become second nature, and that’s one of those invisible victories.
A kid who can say “please” without a cue is already showing signs of kindness and social awareness. Those little words actually matter.
2. They clean up after themselves (at least sometimes)
Now, don’t expect spotless bedrooms here. But if your kid throws their wrapper in the trash or puts their shoes away without a full-blown negotiation, you’re onto something good.
Responsibility starts with those small habits. If they already learned to clean up their own messes, even just a little, you’ve planted a seed of accountability, and that thing can grow fast.
3. They apologize on their own
Watching your child say “I’m sorry” without being forced into it might make your heart do a happy little cartwheel. It’s rare, but when it happens, you find yourself smiling.
They get that they hurt someone’s feelings or messed up, and instead of hiding or blaming, they step up. That’s maturity knocking.
4. They ask questions… lots of them
If your kid asks “why” a thousand times a day, congratulations, you’ve got a thinker. Sure, it can drive you a little nuts, but curiosity means their brain’s firing on all cylinders.
That’s the kind of mindset that leads to problem-solvers, creators, and the kind of people who don’t settle for easy answers.
5. They stand up for themselves (respectfully)
Nobody wants their kid to be a pushover. But also, nobody wants a tiny dictator either. So when your child can speak up respectfully and hold their ground without steamrolling everyone, that’s the sweet spot.
It means they’ve figured out that their voice matters. That’s confidence mixed with self-respect.
6. They show empathy even in weird little ways
Maybe they’ll give you the last cookie. Maybe they pet the neighbor’s old dog like it’s made of glass. Whatever the case, those small flashes of empathy show their heart are in the right place.
Empathy doesn’t always come naturally to kids. So when it pops up on its own, it means something’s clicking. You’re raising a kid who notices how others feel, and that’s a big deal.
7. They’re comfortable being themselves
If your kid wears socks with sandals or sings off-key on purpose, let them. Seriously. Kids who don’t feel the need to fit in every second are raised well by their parents.
When they don’t hide the parts that make them different, that’s confidence with a little spice. It’s also a sign you’ve created a home where being “weird” is totally okay.
8. They’re not afraid to fail
So they built a Lego spaceship, and it collapsed. Again. But instead of flipping the table, they try out a new design.
If your kid shrugs off mistakes and tries again, that’s resilience showing up early. You’re teaching them that it’s okay to stumble as long as they get back up.
9. They share even when they don’t have to
Kids aren’t naturally into sharing, so if you see your child offer their toy or snack without a prompt, that’s a good sign.
Kids who share without being told are showing they’ve started thinking beyond themselves, and that’s something to be proud of as a parent.
10. They look out for others
If your kid checks on a younger sibling after a fall or waits for a friend who’s lagging behind, give yourself a little pat on the back.
It might seem small, but those moments matter. They show that your child is aware of others and is trying to help in their own little way.
11. They laugh with you, not at you
When kids start developing their sense of humor, it can go either way. But if they’re cracking jokes with you and not at you, you’ve got a child who understands respect along with fun.
If your kid uses it to bond and lighten the mood without poking or hurting, that says a lot about the emotional tone you’ve set at home.
12. They take “no” without a full meltdown
Okay, maybe not every time. But when your child hears “no” and doesn’t immediately lose it like the world’s ended, you’ve built something strong there.
Kids who can hear “no” and still keep it together are learning patience, flexibility, and how to handle frustration. That stuff takes years for some adults.
13. They remember your advice and actually use it
Ever hear your kid repeat something you told them like it’s their own original thought? Yeah, that’s a trip. But it also means your words are sticking with them.
When they remember those little life nuggets like “Say thank you,” or “Be kind even when no one’s watching,” and apply them without prompting, that’s parenting paying off right there.
14. They include others without being asked
Watching your kid invite the new kid to join the game or scoot over to make space is heartwarming at best.
Including others doesn’t always come naturally, so if your child is welcoming others in, that’s a sign they’ve learned from the best, and that’s you.
15. They say what they mean
A kid who can express what they’re feeling instead of bottling it up or acting it out is ahead of the game. That level of communication is tough, even for grown-ups.
If your child can say “I’m sad” instead of throwing a tantrum or “I need help” instead of shutting down, that’s emotional awareness in the making. You’re helping them build a skill they’ll use forever.
16. They want to hang out with you (even if they don’t show it all the time)
Maybe they don’t say it outright. But if they still want to sit near you, ask for your opinion, or just randomly plop down next to you on the couch, those moments mean a lot more than they let on.
Kids grow fast and drift into their own worlds. So if they still want to be around you, even just in the same room, that’s a sign of a strong bond. They feel safe, seen, and wanted. That connection? That’s what it’s all about.
Ask Me Anything